Fatima(31)

My boyfriend Ahmed is a software engineer and received an offer from Zalando in Berlin. A salary of €80,000 and the chance to work at one of Europe's largest e-commerce companies — it was an opportunity we couldn't pass up. I worked as a UX designer at an agency in Utrecht, but decided to move along and find something new on the spot. That turned out to be more naive than I thought.

The Anmeldung went smoothly — Ahmed's employer had hired a relocation agency that handled everything. But as a trailing partner without a job I was on my own. I registered at the Agentur für Arbeit, but because I hadn't worked in Germany, I had no right to Arbeitslosengeld. The Arbeitsvermittler advised me to register as Arbeitssuchend (job-seeking) and take an Integrationskurs.

Job hunting as a UX designer in Berlin was a mixed experience. The tech sector largely works in English, which was a big advantage. But many German companies outside tech expect German at B2 level, even for design positions. I applied at thirty companies in three months. Responses ranged from "we're looking for someone fluent in German" to "your portfolio is impressive, when can you start?" Eventually I found a job at a Berlin fintech where English is the working language.

Financially the period without income was tough. Ahmed earned well, but Berlin rents eat your budget. We paid €1,250 for a Zweizimmerwohnung in Friedrichshain. Without my income we depended on one salary. My tip for trailing spouses: ensure a financial buffer of at least four months. And start applying before the move through LinkedIn and StepStone.

The Krankenversicherung as a non-working partner was a surprise. In Germany you can be co-insured as a spouse or registered partner through Familienversicherung — free, if you earn less than €505 per month. But we weren't married. Ahmed was with TK, and I had to take out my own Freiwillige Versicherung for €220 per month. We got married after three months — partly out of love, partly out of Krankenkasse pragmatism. Welcome to Germany.

After a year in Berlin I've found my place. My job at the fintech is enjoyable, I now speak German at B1 level thanks to an evening course at the VHS, and Ahmed and I enjoy Berlin life. The city is perfect for international couples: you can survive in English while learning German. The Nachtleben, the Sunday Flohmärkte and the diversity make Berlin unique. My advice: if you're moving for your partner, see it as an opportunity — not a sacrifice. But be realistic about how long it takes to start over.